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We have mice and it’s a bloody nuisance.
I really don’t mind sharing my home and garden with the local wildlife, so long as they do not actually interfere with me. Spiders, I usually leave very much as I find them; they will deal with flies and mosquitos for me. Incoming birds are simply left to find their own way out again. In the garden of course, I actively encourage them. The odd lizard or gecko is only passing through, as they really want to be outside in the sun.
But mice are a pain. They get everywhere, squeezing through gaps that you would not believe would accommodate a microbe, let alone a rodent. They are in the drawers chewing up fabric, bedding and paper. I find cupboards full of champed up fibres, shredded cloths, towels and clothes. Whenever I move a piece of furniture their droppings are underneath, and this includes the kitchen.
Working my way through the kitchen cupboards, I take all pasta, beans, flour, peas, lentils, dried fruit and nuts out of paper wrappings, and rehouse them in jars and tubs. This does have the extra benefit of tidying up cupboards long overdue for attention. But mainly, it ensures that we will not be accidentally poisoned by food not eaten, but urinated on, or contaminated by faeces. Mice and rats ruin far more food than they ever eat, and while I am fairly relaxed about hygiene (I do not use disinfectants or bleaches unless really necessary; I am a strong believer in building up an immune system), there are limits to what is sensible.
To make matters worse, many of the walls of the house are hollow. The construction style for the house is idiosyncratically Spanish. There are nine upright brick columns, running from foundations to roof, supporting everything. Strange as it looks to English eyes, all the, apparently solid, structural walls of the house are infill, simple curtain walling that does no more than divide one space from another.
This means that most of the outer walling of the house is nothing more than two layers of bricks with a foot or more of empty space between. It is perfect for heat insulation but means that once inside that gap, the mice can run riot and have free access to the entire inside of the house.
HIS son visits. He helps us to remove one of the dilapidated doors, to be replaced by something a bit more functional and decorative. As the old door comes out, the gap between the walls is revealed. It is a good eighteen inches wide and disappears into darkness. “You could bury bodies in there.” he laughs.
*****
I wake.
It’s dark.
I wake in the dark.
Why have I woken? I came to bed tired.
Bark. Bark. Bark. Yap. Yap. Yap. Bark. Bark. Bark. Yap. Yap. Bark…
What the bloody hell is going on up there?
The dogs, Eddie and Alba, sleep in the naya upstairs. The naya is open to the air and so the sound of excited dogs is loud indeed. I don’t mind this normally. The canine contingent doesn’t generally make a lot of noise unless there is something to make a noise at. Anyone coming by this house and garden knows that this property is defended.
I listen.
Yap. Bark. Bark. Yap. Yap. Yap. Bark. Bark. Yap. Yap. Yap. Bark. Bark. Bark. Yap. Yap. Bark………
The dogs do not sound alarmed. Just excited.
Not a prowler then.
Actually, is it both of them? Or just Eddie?
Someone’s having fun……
Wonder if it’s a mouse?
?
?
Bark. Bark. Yap. Yap. Yap. Bark. Bark. Yap. Bark. Bark. Yap. Yap….
I listen again.
There is no sound of the banging, scrabbling and bouncing around that would accompany a mouse hunt. When Eddie finds a mouse, the fleeing ‘wee timorous beastie’ will hide where-ever it is able. This generally entails removal and/or semi-demolition of all handy furniture. In the case of the naya, This would be a table, chairs and two ‘dog sofas’.
Yap. Yap. Yap. Bark. Bark. Yap. Bark. Bark. Yap. Yap….
Bark. Yap. Yap. Yap. Bark. Bark. Bark. Yap. Yap. Bark………
Bark. Yap. Yap. Yap. Bark. Bark. Yap. Yap. Yap. Bark. Bark. Bark. Yap. Yap. Bark……
Oh c’mon guys. It’s….. Check clock …… three in the morning. I’ve got to sleep….
Yap. Yap. Bark. Bark
Yap. Bark. Bark. Yap. Yap. Yap. Bark
Fling back bedcovers.
Stomp into flip-flops.
Grab dressing gown.
Stomp outside.
Stomp back inside to turn on outside lights. Pitch black night. Don’t intend to break my neck on the steps.
Stomp up steps and into naya.
Yap. Bark. Bark. Yap. Bark. Bark. Yap. Yap….
Bark. Yap. Yap. Yap. Bark. Bark. Bark. Yap. Yap. Bark…
Stumble into sooty dark naya. Fumble for light switch. Stumble over something soft in the dark, trip over flip-flops and violently stub toe against wrought iron door.
Swear and curse silently into the night. Memo to Self: Don’t wear flip-flops in the dark…..
Find light switch. Flick.
Item stumbled over revealed to be remains of leather gardening glove, one of Alba’s favourite ‘toys’.
Alba is laid on her settee, in cheerful mood but not doing anything out of the ordinary. She grins at my arrival and her blond otter tail thumps the blankets.
Alba ‘At Rest’
Eddie takes no notice of me. This is because he is stood on the other dog settee, bum in the air, tail waving like a pennant, and long pointy nose shoved as far down the side of the settee cushion as he can. Since he is a Podenco, the Spanish hunting breed, both nose and tail are long and pointy indeed. Combined with his incredibly long legs, wind-sail ears and skinny build, this ‘arse up-head down’ poise, lacks dignity.
‘Cushion’ is a generous description of the object residing on the settee. There has been some form of cushion explosion, and Eddie, yapping wildly all the time, scrabbles down what is left of it, into the settee innards. The naya is three inches deep in scattered foam filling.
Abruptly, there is a break-out.
Mice erupt from under the settee, at least a dozen of them, and scatter in all directions, dashing across the floor in search of safer cover. This is too much for Alba, who leaps from her couch and gives chase, spoiled for choice as to target, as furry squeakers sprint for safety. Several of them flow over the edge of the steps and into the night, and Alba follows headlong, howling wildly as she goes.
Eddie, involved in his sofa autopsy, has not yet noticed the mass rodent exodus, and is still madly trying to establish his mine-shaft into the depths of the sofa. A final mouse disgorges from underneath and he suddenly catches on; giving chase and also vanishing into the night, baying with enthusiasm as he vanishes into the gloom.
I make no attempt to stop him. My chances of catching his attention just now, are as near to nil as makes no odds. Both the dogs might as well enjoy themselves.
Instead, I inspect the remains of the semi-disembowelled settee, cautiously at first, in case there is anything larger than a mouse in there. I am not about to pick a fight with a rat dressed only in dressing-gown and flip-flops.
Discreet probing reveals, in the heart of the wooden frame of the settee, the one thing Eddie could not reach; a mouse nest, quite a big one.
!?!
What kind of mice do they breed around here? How dim do you have to be to make a nest inside the bed where the dogs sleep? When your destiny is probably to end life as a brief furry squeak, would it not be a bright idea to nest somewhere not right under the local wolf pack?
Eddie and Alba return, waggy and panting. Alba plonks herself back on her bed, but Eddie is still intoxicated with the thrill of the chase and starts work again on his excavations. His evening has gone with a wallop and a bang and he sees no reason to stop the fun yet. I leave him, again with bum in the air and head stuck down the side of the cushions.
Time for some sleep.
*****
Buy me a coffee?
Great story, Simone! btw, your Alba looks just like my Lucky, only Lucky’s way too lazy to chase mice!
lol! I don’t believe that for a minute 😉
As much as I claim to be Titan -Made I HATE HATE HATE HATE MICE!!!!! I see them and I damn near go into a dead faint. You are better than me I wold have saw that and would have been packed by the time the sun met the sky. Stay strong, Sister
OMG! Mice is wonderful! Thanks for sharing!
Glad you enjoyed it 🙂
OMG, I’m over here laughing so hard my sides are hurting while tears run down my face!! hahaha, I have mental images of these dogs now
I’ll admit – I nearly peed myself when I saw it 😉
Our mice packed theirbags and left after the combined war plans organised by my husband and our two jack russells and two tonkanese cats. However this has been replaced by rabbits! The cats bring them into the house, deposit them infront of the dogs,who take over by devouring them fur and all. Now this sounds fairly tame,until one night,I’ve headed to bed and died within 30 seconds due to a busy day. I awoke at midnight for a loo stop only to find butch,our male dog,asleep next to me,on the pillow,with what I thought was oneof his soft toys. Turning my bed lamp on I had a minor heart attack……the soft toy was a dead rabbit deposited by the dog. He slept with a grin on his face and his paw around his conquest!!!
lol! – I also have a rabbit story – but I’ll not tell it here. I’ll save it for another ‘small tale’.
Oh my god your dogs are hysterical and glad they got home ok and you were able to sleep. My house in Tucson does not have mice nor rats I don’t know if the resident cat would catch them and kill them or if the dog would either. But my mom has a big 4 level house on Cape Cod in Bourne, MA and her house was inundated until she got a rescue cat now I think there is a sign don’t come in resident mean cat. Love, love, love your books
Yup – on four rescue cats myself now 🙂
When in doubt, add another cat to the mix.
Loving your books!!
lol! Gone from a one cat household to four cats in six months 😉
Moth balls…. we keep a few in the attic and don’t get mice anymore…way back when I was pregnant with my second son I could not sleep and the lot behind our house was cleared out and we had mice big time… called the exterminator and since I was pregnant he wouldn’t put anything dangerous out… he got in the attic and tossed @6 of them…one towards each corner of the house and two in the middle…. I heard a bunch of noise and went in the backyard and watched as mice were jumping out any openings… that son is now 26 and 3 times a year we put moth balls in the attic and don’t get anymore mine, never had a bat (neighbors do), no snakes , squirrels or any pesty animal comes in the house… my GYN even said it was safe to have the moth balls around…oh and the second best part is no smell either… good luck!
Mothballs! Great idea. I’ll do that 🙂
My mouse story is every year we get them in droves when they take down fields . My husband is a big guy who has no problem teasing me about my fear of spiders, his fear of mice is over the top . We have a rag doll cat who is more dog then cat. She fetches one night I wake to my husband’s screams only to be told stormy the cat sat on his chest and some him just as he opened his eyes she dropped mouse she fetches but didn’t kill on his face. Love your books
lol! Love it. That’s a mouse story that might make it into one of my books sometime 🙂
Simone
I have a similar story. Every winter a few little field mice will make it into our house. Last winter was really bad & my husband hated the smell of the peppermint oil I used the previous winter (that worked really well). Our current rescue dogs who obey my commands pretty well are not good mousers. Our previous Cairn Terrier & 2 Yorkies were very good at keeping squirrels, mice racoons, skunks & possums out of our house & yard based on their genes & their adopted momma who was a 145 lb Rottie who taught them very well. When our year old 7 lb female Yorkie decided to take a special present on to the bed with daddy. You could have heard my husband’s yell a block away. He thought she had one of her little chewy toys with her not a mouse. Another time our Cairn was right after one. It ran in the kitchen with Trouble a snap away from nailing it when I hear a loud yell. I look and there is my motorcycle riding, sheet metal worker husband standing on one of our kitchen chairs yelling at me about Trouble & the 1 oz baby mouse for me to get our back doors open so Trouble could take care of it outside. The glue pads work really well. I put them under dressers, living room couch & chairs where our dogs couldn’t step on them. Will get some of the rat ones for this winter just in case.😉
Sounds like you live ina household a lot like mine lol! Now that I have four cats, the discovered total this week is one live mouse, two dead mice and half a rat…
I have only one story about mice in my house. I had a dog who was so friendly that the neighbors cat brought her 2 week old kittens to my yard and left them with my dog for hours. My dog just licked them into a circle and curled up with them until mama cat returned and took them back home. About a year later, I had moved to a new home and we were sitting in the living room, when a mouse ran across the floor, right in front of my dog. My dog watched the mouse and then looked at me as if asking me when did we get another pet? I watched my dog lick every other animal he came across. So that your dogs chased the mice is impressive to me. On the other hand I might suggest getting peppermint oil to put around where don’t want to have mice. It’s supposed to keep bugs away too.
lol! Great story – My problem is pretty much sorted out now by having three dogs and four cats. 🙂
We had rats in our garage/ storage area.They ruined thousands of dollars of food, beautiful rugs,camping gear,you name it..It was awful but Snickers bars in traps were irresistible to the 17 we caught..Luckily one layer of of particle board was unharmed and they didn’t make it into the house..I can truly sympathize with your circumstances..We had three dogs and five cats that would go nuts from the scrabbling..But,none of them were brave enough to get any of the rats themselves..Just barked and meowed like crazy..I have been enjoying you and your books for over a year..Happy hunting to your dogs!
lol! We’re on top of the problem these days. Since I am now a three dog/four cat household, the mice have moved on. I still get ‘presents’ of half a rat dropped in the kitchen from time to time 🙂
I had an explosion of mice a couple of years ago I lost count at 125 in 6 weeks. A person I know recommended glue pads they are non toxic and harmless to animals unless they get stuck on them, ( which my dogs paws did ). I tried the mouse traps and found was getting several on it at a time then found the large rat glue pads and boy they worked great it didn’t let them go over top of the ones that were stuck to the pad. Eventually I ended up getting all of them. My daughter even rescued a few and let them loose way in the back yard. I still get the occasional mouse and when I do I put out traps where I find droppings. I usually know we have some because I am allergic to the droppings and my nose starts to bleed when they leave them. Even though spiders are good for several things also I am allergic to them too and the pads work great for them too.
P. S. Love your books too
OMG! Glue pads? Never encountered those before, although I suppose it’s the same principle as fly paper. And I’m so pleased you enjoy my books too 🙂